Eat in moderation. Walk for 40 minutes. Surround yourself with positive people. How women can lead a healthy life.

Stress and hectic lifestyle can impact one’s libido. If ‘Honey, I have a headache!!’ has become your man’s line of late. Most women take sexual rejection very personally, especially if their sense of self worth is linked to love and acceptance from their partner. When her man turns down a sexual advance by women, she views herself as being an inadequate lover, spouse and even a person. She believes that her lovability is defined by the affection she receives or does not receive from her partner.
MELTDOWN IN BED

The current trend of sexless marriages, due to lowered self-esteem of men facing a financial crisis and resultant stress, is leading to varied reactions among women. Some workingwomen who are aware of the global crisis, show greater empathy and do not blame their partner for the financial situation, or the subsequent lack of interest in sex. Instead, they assume the role of a sounding board, and also attempt to motivate them to be optimistic and deal with the crisis together.

On the other hand, some women add to their husband’s woes by being confrontational, demanding, aggressive and blaming them for the loss of both, ‘money and sex’ and launch a direct attack on their partner’s manhood. This only makes matters worse. The woman, who has shoved a guilt trip down her husband’s throat, can be rest assured that the financial crisis may end, but her sex life will never improve.

Women need to understand that ‘sex is not between the legs but between the ears’, and therefore also understand that a healthy and relaxed mind is important for mutually satisfying physical intimacy.

SELF WORTH FACTOR
Some women get confused and anxious with the sudden withdrawal of sex, get depressed and might suspect that their partner is having an extra-marital affair or satisfying his sexual urges in other ways.

In some cases, over consumption of alcohol can be a problem, especially with regular drinkers who try to deal with stress via alcohol. This takes a huge toll on the relatioship and might end up whining about problems and doesn’t wish to address the crisis in a logical manner.

In such condition, marriage counseling helps. Also, stress counseling helps the man deal with the financial and sexual lull in life.

A man can be taught to reach out and be sensitive to his wife’s needs, and the women can be educated to not make it all about herself, be ‘emotionally available’ and not use the partner’s vulnerability against him ever. The couple must remember that this is a temporary but crucial phase.

Moreover, the ‘emotional intimacy’ during this crisis can strengthen their relationship, and there can be some surprising moments of physical intimacy, emerging from such emotional bonding.

COPING WITH IT
1.      A wife could use these troubled times to build the emotional intimacy and companionship with her husband and engage him in small joys in an unpressurising manner, such as sharing the child’s achievement in school.

2.      She could engage in non-sexual touching like offering a back rub or head massage to bond with him.

3.      She shouldn’t mind her partner wanting to spend time with his colleagues who enlighten him on ways to deal with the problem, not make any unreasonable demands.

4.      Tell him that both of you will get through it ‘together’, nad that you believe in his abilities.

5.      Ensure that he doesn’t blame himself. Assure him that everyone is in the same boat. Help him accept uncertainties and forgive himself for human errors, if any.

6.      She can help de-stigmatize seeking professional help. If he is depressed, accompany him to a counselor.

7.      She could identify what brings him joy. Small things such as cooking his favourite meal, inviting his best friend over for dinner can help him.

8.      At times, when he is relaxed, she could take the lead, touch him sensually, with no pressure to perform, and see if he wants to take it forward.

9.      The woman, of course, has her own emotional and physical needs. She could channelise her libido in work and children, or sublimate her sexual desires in creative pursuits. If she is spiritually inclined, then prayer and meditation can give her comfort.

10.  She could also engage in self-pleasuring from time to time to deal with her own heightened sexual desires.

Pregnant mothers, please note! You should increase consumption of eggs and meat as they contain a nutrient 'choline' that can lower your infant's risk of developing stress-related illnesses later in life,

  
Nutrition scientists and obstetricians at Cornell University and the University of Rochester Medical Center found that higher-than-normal amounts of choline in the diet during pregnancy can change epigenetic markers.
Epigenetic markers are modifications on human DNA that tell genes to switch on or off, to go gangbusters or keep a low profile in the fetus.

While epigenetic markers don't change genes, they make a permanent imprint by dictating their fate: If a gene is not expressed - turned on - it's as if it didn't exist.
Researchers discovered that the affected markers were those that regulated the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal or HPA axis, which controls virtually all hormone activity in the body, including the production of the hormone cortisol that reflects our response to stress and regulates our metabolism, among other things.
Researchers studied 26 pregnant women in their third trimester who were assigned to take 480 mg of choline per day.
The study found that more choline in the mother's diet led to a more stable HPA axis and consequently less cortisol in the fetus.
The study is important because it shows that a relatively simple nutrient can have significant effects in prenatal life, and that these effects likely continue to have a long-lasting influence on adult life," said Eva K Pressman, study author and director of the high-risk pregnancy program at the University of Rochester Medical Center.
While our results won't change practice at this point, the idea that maternal choline intake could essentially change fetal genetic expression into adulthood is quite novel," Pressman said in a statement.
The findings raise the possibility that choline may be used therapeutically in cases where excess maternal stress from anxiety, depression or other prenatal conditions might make the fetal HPA axis more reactive and more likely to release greater-than-expected amounts of cortisol, researchers said.

Suicides have now become so commonplace that they are now the second leading cause of death amongst the youth. What drives a person to take such a radical step like suicide? If you are going through suicidal thoughts very often, what should you do to avoid succumbing to them?
 One could choose to end his life for a plethora of reasons. It could be due to:

• A Profound sense of loss due to the death of a loved one
• A Relationship break-up/ divorce
• Major issues in your personal relationships
• Abuse of any kind
• Lack of direction in life
• Helplessness or the feeling of not being able to control your life. 
• Major failures in business or career

If you are prone to suicidal thoughts very often, here some things you can do to help yourself

• Talk to someone before you act on your impulse. Thoughts of self-harm are highly intense, loaded with emotion. But they are fairly short-lived. Their intensity reduces by talking and/or crying it out. It takes a split second to act but if you let the impulse pass, the feeling passes by.
• Communicate – with family, close ones, friends. If you cannot talk freely to anyone, a counsellor or psychologist can help you get a neutral view on what is happening.
•  Mission – ME FIRST! Write nice things about yourself (or get your good friends to write it for you) and paste in on your wall. Make yourself your first priority. Pamper yourself with things you like. Surround yourself with people you like..
• Get some fresh air everyday – take walks in a garden or any open area.
• Take up any physical activity – join a gym or play some sport. Physical exercise has been proven to help channelize thoughts better.
• Learn something new – a new language, a new hobby. If you can’t figure out the one thing you want to do, try many and pick one or two things which make you feel good.
• Help the underprivileged. You’ll be surprised to see how many people around you need help. Sometimes, we learn unexpected lessons of faith and hope from such people.
•   Give yourself some time to heal and give your emotions some leeway. If you feel like crying, just do it. If you want to write down your thoughts, just do it.
•  Whatever you are going through, give life a chance, it’s worth it!

When you know someone who is suicidal…

1. Take them seriously. Suicidal people tend to leave hints for others.
2. Just being there for the person may sometimes be the best thing you can do. If you cannot be with him/her all the time, make sure someone else is.
3. Talk to the person regularly and help him/her believe that he/she will overcome any problem that is making them think of something as drastic as suicide. And do remember to really listen to them while they speak their heart out.
4. Make them feel good about themselves. Remind them of their achievements, their goals, their dreams. Surround them with their loved ones. Make them believe that life’s worth living.
5. If nothing seems to work, take him/her to a good counsellor or psychologist.

 Suicide is a multi-determined phenomenon that occurs against a background of complex interacting biological, social, psychological and environmental risk and protective factors. Despite the complexity of this phenomenon, suicide can be prevented.

On average, almost 3000 people commit suicide daily. For every person who completes a suicide, 20 or more may attempt to end their lives. The sponsoring International Association for Suicide Prevention, the co-sponsor WHO and other partners advocate for the prevention of suicidal behaviour, provision of adequate treatment and follow-up care for people who attempted suicide, as well as responsible reporting of suicides in the media.

 At the global level, awareness needs to be raised that suicide is a major preventable cause of premature death. Governments need to develop policy frameworks for national suicide prevention strategies. At the local level, policy statements and research outcomes need to be translated into prevention programmes and activities in communities.     

The problem

• Every year, almost one million people die from suicide; a “global” mortality rate of 16 per 100,000, or one death every 40 seconds.
• In the last 45 years suicide rates have increased by 60% worldwide. Suicide is among the three leading causes of death among those aged 15-44 years in some countries, and the second leading cause of death in the 10-24 years age group; these figures do not include suicide attempts which are up to 20 times more frequent than completed suicide.
• Suicide worldwide is estimated to represent 1.8% of the total global burden of disease in 1998, and 2.4% in countries with market and former socialist economies in 2020.
• Although traditionally suicide rates have been highest among the male elderly, rates among young people have been increasing to such an extent that they are now the group at highest risk in a third of countries, in both developed and developing countries.
• Mental disorders (particularly depression and alcohol use disorders) are a major risk factor for suicide in Europe and North America; however, in Asian countries impulsiveness plays an important role. Suicide is complex with psychological, social, biological, cultural and environmental factors involved.

 Effective interventions

• Strategies involving restriction of access to common methods of suicide, such as firearms or toxic substances like pesticides, have proved to be effective in reducing suicide rates; however, there is a need to adopt multi-sectoral approaches involving many levels of intervention and activities.
• There is compelling evidence indicating that adequate prevention and treatment of depression and alcohol and substance abuse can reduce suicide rates, as well as follow-up contact with those who have attempted suicide.

Challenges and obstacles

• Worldwide, the prevention of suicide has not been adequately addressed due to basically a lack of awareness of suicide as a major problem and the taboo in many societies to discuss openly about it. In fact, only a few countries have included prevention of suicide among their priorities.
• Reliability of suicide certification and reporting is an issue in great need of improvement.
• It is clear that suicide prevention requires intervention also from outside the health sector and calls for an innovative, comprehensive multi-sectoral approach, including both health and non-health sectors, e.g. education, labour, police, justice, religion, law, politics, the media.

Everybody worried about something right.Wives worry about husbands and vice versa,Parents worry about their children, Chldren worry about their exams.All of us are worried about the rising cost of food and fuel. But is worry necessary? Studies show that people who worry a lot are less effective than those who don’t; they get less work done and are often less happy

Worried

Worry is a direct source of headaches, insomnia, ulcers and other gastric distress, paranoia, generalized anxiety disorders, depression and phobias.
Most stress experts believe that it is an indirect source of disorders involving the immune system. Individuals can literally worry themselves to death. It might disrupt daily routine, hamper ability focus at work, or keep an individual from falling asleep at night. More seriously, one might find oneself unable to do any thing about worry, until it gets to the point where worry controls one’s life.

I was trying to cross the road, waited, looked to my left, then to right and assessed the flow of the traffic to decide when to cross. I was worried about getting hit by a moving vehicle. Can we say that ‘worry’ of this kind is waste of time? Hopefully not!. Because fear of this sort is a natural human tendency right and necessity for self-preservation. Without having appropriate worry or concern about our safety, our days on earth would not continue for very long! So next time when you give a advice, ‘Don’t worry, be calm!’ think again! You may be robbing the person of a vital self-protecting emotion.

So, which kind of worrying is a waste of time? Ideas about whether we will be received well, people will recognise us, whether we will make a good impression or what people will think about us?

How to wish worries away

• Keep yourself busy. Look at rational assumption of a problem and also alternative solutions.

• Don’t fuss about trifles, Don’t permit little things to ruin your long-term happiness.

• 3.Avoid being in the company of people who always find the negative in the positive.

• Be aware all the feelings experience due to a problem.

• Bury the past which is dead.

• Physical exercise, deep breathing and meditation helps when you are feeling stressed.

• Be in sync with your natural sleep-wake cycle.

• Write down the positive affirmative statements prior to sleep Ex, I am free from worry, tension, stress, anxiety, anger, insomnia, pain…..I have good memory, focus, attention, confidence, relationship…..

• 9.When an option is not visible, sleep over the problem and you might find the answer next morning. The brain works calmly when you sleep

Good Luck!!!